2002 Demented Breakfast Cereal Treats
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Click on any small picture
below to see a bigger version of it.
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2nd Prize Winner
Bamiyan
Buddha/Venice Charter Violation
by Charles and Shaula
In commemoration of
the immense Afghani statue of the Buddha destroyed in 2001 by the
Taliban.
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The Bamiyan Buddha
In the Bamiyan Valley of Afghanistan, two Buddha statues were
carved into sandstone cliffs sometime in the 3rd Century, AD. The
valley was a regular stop of the silk caravan route and reflected the
area being a major Buddhist center from the 2nd Century through the
9th Century. After they were carved, their detail was built up with
mud and straw, plastered over and the final results painted. It is
believed the larger Buddha was red and the smaller was blue, with
their faces and hands in gold.
The taller statue (approximated here as it appeared in 1979) was 53
meters tall (175 feet), and the largest statue figure in the world.
The smaller statue was 36 meters tall (120 feet).
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Before (Person by
right foot)
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After
( People are in
foreground)
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In March 2001, the Taliban destroyed the Buddhas because they
considered them offensive. For years, many organizations had tried to
save the Buddhas, and some even offered money to preserve them. The
Taliban refused, arguing that it was hypocritical to offer money to
save statues when there were children starving in their country. It
was apparently not hypocritical to be spending money on ordnance for
destruction. CNN.com quoted Information Minister Qudratullah Jamal:
"The destruction work is not as easy as people would think," he said.
"You can't knock down the statues by dynamite or shelling as both of
them have been carved in a cliff. They are firmly attached to the
mountain." After the destruction, the Taliban attempted to sell pieces
of the Buddhas.
Although some groups called for rebuilding the Buddhas, UNESCO
(United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization)
says the Venice Charter forbids the reconstruction of monuments on the
principle that a cultural artifact cannot be replaced.
In memory of the Buddhas of Bamiyan and in possible violation of
the Venice Charter, we render the larger statue in Kellogg’s Rice
Crispies using 1/100 scale for Andy and Project Alchemy’s birthday.
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3rd Prize Winner
Box Art: Solidaribits and Manifesto
by Paul, Rebecca and William
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MANIFESTO in Defense of Demented Breakfast
Cereal Treat BOX Art, as Opposed to Cereal Treat Art Per Se
Whereas…
• Demented BOX Art has emerged, in recent years, as the most
dynamic and popular trend in the Demented Breakfast Cereal Treat Art
of our time.
• Any really decent breakfast cereal is, by definition, not only lumpy
and extra crunchy but also of a beige, tan, or brown hue, thereby
narrowing the textural, shapular, and colorific expression of cereal
art beyond the reasonable creative constraints of art and design. See
Addendum: Exhibit A (leftwing).
• The only breakfast cereal treats affording the demented cereal
artiste an adequate textural, shapular, and colorific palette are
tasteless, unhealthy, laced with Red, Yellow, and Blue Dyes
#1–999,999,999, and produced by workers exploited for obscene profits
by evil multinational corporations. See Addendum: Exhibit B
(rightwing).
• Demented BOX Art, unlike cereal treat art per se, does not require
the purchase of tasteless, unhealthy breakfast cereal treat products.
• Tasteless, unhealthy breakfast cereal treat products, though by
definition tasteless—and did we mention unhealthy?—do nevertheless
consist of Food.
• Food, no matter how tasteless and/or unhealthy, is better consumed
by hungry human beings, even by beasts, than fondled by demented
cereal artistes—and ultimately, let’s face it, wantonly destroyed as
so much unrecyclable rubbish.
• Demented BOX Art, unlike its antecedent cereal treat art per se,
does not require said wanton destruction of said food in said
unrecyclable rubbish.
• Demented BOX Art, unlike cereal art per se, if produced on recycled
paper as are this Manifesto and its accompanying SolidariBits, does
not even kill many trees. And those it does kill, die gladly.
• The soi-disant Judges, a.k.a. the Management, of said Contest, in
its notorious first six years, have displayed an unconscionable
preference in favor of the same old Establishment cereal treat “art,”
which the demented public and critics alike have deemed “so over.”
These same Judges have flaunted their blinkered prejudice against
demented BOX Art, the aforementioned culmination not only of Demented
Breakfast Cereal Treat Art but of Art in its entirety as we know it.
Herewith…
• Now that we have exposed to said demented public said intrinsic
contradictions of said Contest, heretofore unspoken except sotto voce
in alienated caucuses, our nonnegotiable demand is for said Judges of
said 7th Annual Demented Breakfast Cereal Treat Contest to redress
said wrongs by beginning to recognize, representationally, said
contributions of said demented BOX artistes everywhere. You may start
with SolidariBits. Now. Do not attempt to co-opt us with even your
most magnificent trophy. If chosen, we will not accept. If elected, we
will not serve. (Well, perhaps we might. Oh, all right, if you
insist.)
Addendum: Exhibit A. PCC extra-crunchy granola.
Tastes better than it looks. And so good for you. Honest.
Addendum: Exhibit B. Fruit Loops.
Look better than they taste. Sweetened cardboard soaked in Red,
Yellow, and Blue Dyes. Purchased, years ago, by starving breakfast
cereal treat artistes, since driven to dementia by the past
capriciousness of said Judges.
This must stop. |
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